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Achromatic lifestyle;; when life gets too long && the hate that goes unloved

Odi et amo. Quare id faciam, fortasse requiris? Nescio, sed fieri sentio et excrucior.

I hate and I love. Why do I do this, perhaps you ask? I know not, but I feel it happening and I am tortured

I begin with a latin poem I was shown by an AWESOME friend of mine (whom i :heart: dearly) and it describes how i feel indiscriminately. I’m so damn desperate that i’m surprised no one has shoved me into a dating agency where i’ll get raped. The joy of life. I’m so damn sentimental it screws with my mind.

But no matter how retarded I end up;; I have my true friends. Seriously, if ANYONE screws with them; I’ll fuck them up. I value friendship above all and when something as such is lost; i’m the one lost. I want to give shout outs though these people know who they are but well, they might not appreciate if I put their name in here without warning.

So you guys are warned. (These are in no substantially particular order).

I’m starting off with Lauren. Lozza. Lozibee. Whatever shizz. She’s the shit that makes me wake up every day and be like; yay, skating. She’s the only one who can piss me off and make me laugh at the same time. She’s friggen awesome in short.

Two. Lowanna. She’s the motherfriggen awesome bitch that pushes me back up in the boxer’s ring. She tells me that she cares and means it. She’s one of those one in a thousand who are one of those girls who tell it to you straight and not screw with your mind. For that, she’s the shit.

Three. Loretta. Young as she is; she’s there when i need a hand, an ear or a cookie. lol. She’s always up for a hug (which i adore) and ready to lend a sympathetic ear. And talk about the kashizz in her dance moves.. which i attempt and it screws up miserably. If anything, she’d be the 2nd raddest younger sis ever!

Four. My group. School friends galore, I love you guys. From Anh to Vicky. You guys are my lifeblood and i wouldn’t know what to do without you guys. There’s always one of you to pat me on the back and tell me to try again. And there’s always one of you to reciprocate jokes and not just throw me off. I can’t imagine life without you all cause seriously, you are all f*cking awesome friends and if it wasn’t for you guys, who knows, i’d be long gone. You know what i mean. <3

Five. The Beckster. Beckky, duh fred. This little blonde is my raddd morning buddy who’s my bad influence and dearest counseller. If it wasn’t for her, i’d be this boring little goody goody nerd probably but cause she is what she is; she’s friggen mad. She gives awesome hugs and our little shopping trips in kogarah are worth all the time in the world. It’s great to have a girl who can talk straight and about boys at the same time. Absolutely fab i tell you.

Six. Yaz and Lan; Though you bitches left me, you know, i love you guys. lol. You left me in a hell hole of ice. But still, you guys are fab. even though I was a damn straight bitch to you guys cause of my sentimental tendencies, you stuck by and even now, you keep in contact. And that’s what makes you guys so damn awesome.
If i’ve missed anyone, seriously, spam me cause you know i love you guys. These include my dearly beloved family and sister. As for the hardships in life, i believe i wouldn’t have made it through without my friends. The ones who’ve stayed true and haven’t changed their tune unlike the others who i have proudly dubbed PRETEND FRIENDS. Those asses know who they are.

Anyways, that’s all i have to say for now. I better return to msn.

Ciao for now, xxx

Myspace whores, photoshop and sex;; the beauty && the bitch.

Well. Life’s like that.

I’ve decided I’m actually gonna try be skinny. Even anorexic skinny. Who knows where I get to. ANY WAYS. Camp was Wed, Thurs, Fri and it was the raddest fun i’ve had in ages. I mean, i pretty much CONQUERED my damn fear of heights of which i’m so proud of.

a) I did all levels in the High rope course spanning from 5 min to 10m above ground.

b) Abseiling was easy shit so no comment.

c) TRAPEZE was the hardest to get around seeing you jump off an 8m platform reaching for a trapeze rope (which i did quite easily to my surprise)

And along which I had plenty of junk and now feel like some kinda binge eater which technically, i’am.

Oh hum.

Anyways.

Yeh.

So that’s it for now.

Imma gonna go get some sleep.

THANKS TO THE PEOPLE WHO VIDEOED/DREW on me when I slept at camp.

Yes, i now know:

1. I look great with a curly black moustache half rubbed off.

2. That i sleep with my eyes open.

The joy of reality.

And the irony of me wanting to prank others when I’m usually the one who sleeps the earliest.

Carve the truth on my wrists;; don’t lie, i didn’t, u did, is that possible?

Well, it certainly has been a while since I’ve posted something decent since my … ‘relapse’. It’s safe to say that honey and yoghurt are not ‘cookable’ objects and are severely reactive to the touch of a fry pan. It’s Term 1 holidays yet I feel I have neither achieved academical work nor enjoyed my holidays sufficiently. In short, it flopped. It’s 8.48pm and I’m supposed to be in bed, ready for tomorrow morning bright and early yet here I sit, the tip tap of the keys breaking the subtle silence along with a myriad of night life (cri-kee, cri-kee and WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF). I’m reflecting on the day and it’s safe to say that… emo moments are brief yet a daily find. Another find is that I’ve finally (it seems) gotten my period after a whole year of lack thereof. An unfortunate find. Terribly so. And what makes matters worse is that is torrential (aka. HEAVY). Ew much? From this discovery, I was crying in self pity today at the rink (in my usual spot, the bathroom, cubicle 1) when I noticed:

a. There was no need to cut myself… the cut between my legs was losing me enough blood.

and

b. Why they hell was I crying?

Weird huh? I know. Maybe its in my genetic make up? Things like this you never know. Another thought that crossed me from my pitiful mood to one of great melanchony is my lack of wanted male company which is very very very sad and therefore I shall make no more reference to it.

Now imagine what you people (well, person [Beckyy, haha]) are thinking of me as you read my extremely random posts. In short, I’m a bitch with low self esteem who can put on a fake smile and aura of superiority as easy as putting on a pad. Anyways, another thing i was thinking of was that my coach called me fat.

Well, she did.

Well, therefore this came into effect:

♥. ◕ ◡ ◕ ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

That’s right. My msn name on April 24/4/08 THURS (though first put up yesterday… same day as the day my blessed period decided to hit me with all the force of a speeding magic mushroom user).

For those of you who want to know what the count down actually is; its my weight. From 50kg hopefully to 45 and then to a final of 40 (of which I’d be extremely proud of). Except, if I do as said… I’ll lose all the “womanly” curves I have gained; my sexy bust (which has expanded and finally filled out a 10A) and well… that’s all the “sexy curves” i have/want.

And this in turn led to my screwing of Jeffrey Black’s mind.

Funny how things work out.

I believe so too.

Screwing minds. :333

I made this post for Becky cause ILY. :D. This following conversation will high light the stupidity of one called Jeffrey Black. Enjoy. [FYI: The following accusations (stuff like I hate Becky) are absolutely false. As for the threats against Jeffrey... I'm not so sure i was lying about that.... HAHA]

D♥. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

Ok

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

fine

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

i’ll tell you

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

But you can’t tell becky

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

o rite?

Crazy Mental Homicidal Pyromaniac says:

ok

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

Good

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

its the days till i get becky

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

True goal is to kill her

Crazy Mental Homicidal Pyromaniac says:

huh?

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

but a bit of damage one hurt

Crazy Mental Homicidal Pyromaniac says:

no its not

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

no seriously

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

i hate her.

Crazy Mental Homicidal Pyromaniac says:

y isnt the countdown counting down then

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

till the day i get a knife

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

And well, go figure.

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

I mean, FINALLY

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

I’m biding my time bucko

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

now don’t tell any one.

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

Or else.

Crazy Mental Homicidal Pyromaniac says:

i still dont believe u

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

You little shite. I HATE REBECCA. What part don’t you understand?

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

I want to friggen kill her.

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

Jeez.

Crazy Mental Homicidal Pyromaniac says:

u dont have the killer instinkt

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

Bull shit ass hole

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

Ive already hurt someone bad

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

gotten suspended

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

but who cares right?

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

Not like the school record counts for anything

Crazy Mental Homicidal Pyromaniac says:

ive gotten suspended 3 times

Crazy Mental Homicidal Pyromaniac says:

for bullshit reasons

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

Good for ya kiddo

Crazy Mental Homicidal Pyromaniac says:

school records are quite often lies

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

Anyways whatever shit, ihate her guts,, stupid blonde bimbo

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

Satisfied?

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

Now don’t tell.

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

Cause if you do.

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

Well my honey boy, you’re next.

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

Crazy Mental Homicidal Pyromaniac says:

yeh right

Crazy Mental Homicidal Pyromaniac says:

i no ur lieing

Crazy Mental Homicidal Pyromaniac says:

so ill go tell her right now

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

You fukin tell her and i’ll fuken come tonight

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

Capiche?

Crazy Mental Homicidal Pyromaniac says:

nope

Crazy Mental Homicidal Pyromaniac says:

she dont believe me

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

Exactly.

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

That’s why i told you.

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

still

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

you told her

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

Your friggen next

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

feel special.

Crazy Mental Homicidal Pyromaniac says:

no

Crazy Mental Homicidal Pyromaniac says:

if u try and kill me, ill rape u

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

oh hahahaa

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

Very scary ickle winky

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

rape is SO much scarier than a friggen magnum .45

Crazy Mental Homicidal Pyromaniac says:

i dont care if i die

Crazy Mental Homicidal Pyromaniac says:

ude be doing me a favour

Crazy Mental Homicidal Pyromaniac says:

but ide still rape u

Crazy Mental Homicidal Pyromaniac says:

a keep u alive for a while if possible

Crazy Mental Homicidal Pyromaniac says:

and rape u heaps more

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

Try get friggen near my pussy… you wouldn’t even touch my arm

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

And you know what?

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

your a fuking man slut

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

Crazy Mental Homicidal Pyromaniac says:

no im not

Crazy Mental Homicidal Pyromaniac says:

if i was i wouldnt be a virgin now would i?

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

Anyways jah

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

well hun bun

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

you wouldn’t know how to rape me woul dyou?

Crazy Mental Homicidal Pyromaniac says:

great now uve made becky block me

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

No i haven’t

Crazy Mental Homicidal Pyromaniac says:

yes i would

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

Its your own damn fault asshole

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

Who told you to go blab?

Crazy Mental Homicidal Pyromaniac says:

have sex with u without ur informed consent

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

Trust me hun, she’s thanking me

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

so what

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

what hole would you put your tiny pindick in?

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

jeez

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

your dicks probably the size of my thimble

Crazy Mental Homicidal Pyromaniac says:

my dick isnt a dindick

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

no

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

its a PIN diclk

Crazy Mental Homicidal Pyromaniac says:

and no, its a lot bigger than that

Crazy Mental Homicidal Pyromaniac says:

pin*

Crazy Mental Homicidal Pyromaniac says:

and in ur vagina

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

which hole is it motherfucka?

Crazy Mental Homicidal Pyromaniac says:

ur vagina

Crazy Mental Homicidal Pyromaniac says:

y dont u try and kill me, and ill show u wat hole

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

rofl

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

thats cause you want it. Admit it you sex-whore… you wanna fuck me right?

Crazy Mental Homicidal Pyromaniac says:

no

Crazy Mental Homicidal Pyromaniac says:

rape isnt about the sex

Crazy Mental Homicidal Pyromaniac says:

its about the power

Crazy Mental Homicidal Pyromaniac says:

id prefer my first time to be with someone that i like and who likes me

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

power my friggen ass

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

you know

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

you contradict yourself bucko

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

cause if i came tonight

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

and you raped me

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

then damn well

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

your first time isn’t with someone you like and like syou

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

but then again

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

LIKE THATS GONNA HAPPEN

Crazy Mental Homicidal Pyromaniac says:

i said i would prefer it to be that way

Crazy Mental Homicidal Pyromaniac says:

not that it will be

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

Awww too bad ickle bunnikins

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

I’m not giving you the honour of popping my friggen cherry

Crazy Mental Homicidal Pyromaniac says:

its probably already been popped

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

you wish buddy

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

I’m savin it … for i know who

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says:

Crazy Mental Homicidal Pyromaniac says:

sure

. ok ok, enough shit. Count down begins: 50 [/] cuts && [x] kisses. Brown eyed suicide Non-bimbo bitch says: